1) Though shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping
(Why wait that long?)

2. Thou shall not do drugs
(Do alcohol, it last longer and cheaper)

3. Thou shall not shoplift from k-mart
(Walmart has a bigger section)

4. Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism
(Destruction has a huge effect, and why the hell will you let yourself be arrested?

5. Thou shall not steal from your parents.
(Everyone knows grandma has more money)

6. Thou shall not get into fights.
(Start them)

7. Thou shall not skip class
(Just take the whole day off)

8. Thou shall not kiss boys in the hallway.
(kiss them outside)

9. Thou shall not worry about tests.
(Just cheat on them = Better marks)

10. Thou shall not help old ladies accross the street
(Leave 'em in the middle)